Mr. Monday and other tales of Jewish Amsterdam

30 Adr. Monday and Other Tales of Jewish Amsterdam

Or when an opera will be performed by a famous company from Italy and a monstrously fat polisher tells his apprentice "You go to Carré and book me two seats."

"Two? Is your wife coming with you? I thought she was ill in bed."

"No, I'm going by myself. But tonight I want to sit comfortably and spread myself."

That evening, when the polisher arrives at the opera house, he finds that the two seats the boy has reserved are one behind the other...

Such impudent behaviour is appreciated by the polishers because they too have a fine sense of humour. They poke fun at each other continuously, so how can they be angry when someone kids them in return?

Perhaps they are tolerant towards the young fellows because they recognise themselves as they were once, long ago when they had no children who had to go to school and no wife who needed money for housekeeping. The apprentice is taught the trade like a fish learns to swim. After a few years he cannot live on dry land. That's why all the diamond workers return to the trade sooner or later, even though they've been out of work for a year. They say, "It's a rotten profession, but only when you don't love it you hate it."

The salesmen who hawk their wares in the diamond factories are also a favourite butt of jokes. However, sometimes they manage snide remarks back too. Just listen to this story.

"Have you heard about Levie?"

"Which Levie do you mean?"

"The one who goes with his suitcase along the factories."