De zoon van een gazzen

I knew Ithamar wouldn’t leave without saying good-bye or leaving a note. From the office of the Command I went home. I laid down and tried to rest, but I was too tense. I got up and paced up and down the room. I picked up a book and, without being able to absorb a single phrase, tried for some time to read. Nothing came out of the printed page, just a lot of little black bugs made of ink. When the evening approached my restlessness became unbearable. I left the room. Van Fried is in the hospital synagogue now, I thought when I reached Jaffa Street. Til wait by the gate and see him leave the hospital. Then I’ll know that everything is all right.’ I said to myself.

The sun was setting in bloody glory and the light was failing rapidly. I passed a couple of times in front of the hospital, looking for a place from where to keep watch on the gate. East of the hospital, some fifty yards from the gate, on the opposite side of the Street, was an alley between two houses. As I was Crossing the Street toward the alleyway, I saw a motionless figure leaning against the wall. Ithamar! He was wearing a shabby brown jacket and a grey cap, rusty with age, was pulled over his forehead. Our eyes met in a long stare.

A faint smile appeared on his wan and tense face. ‘You mustn’t be here now,’ he whispered.

‘Ithamar, don’t! You hear me, don’t!’ My voice faltered. Ithamar’s ex-pression changed abruptly: the smile disappeared, his eyes narrowed and their look became sharp as a knife.

‘Go away!’ He said gruffly.

Ifyou really want to stop him, you have got to do it now, right now, surged through my mind.

‘I am not going to!’ I squeezed through my dry throat. I feit as if here, in the alleyway, in the view of the gate from which Van Fried was to emerge any minute now, was going to be decided the fate of our movement. It was the turning point. Were we going to use our arms from now on in our internal struggle, tooi Wasn’t it enough that we were forced to kill in self defense? If the Old Man were to know, he would have sent men to put Ithamar under guard until Van Fried was safely away. I was sure he would. It was my duty to let the Old Man know, anyway. Now I had no choice. I was the only one who knew. I have got to prevent it, whirled in my mind. ‘Ithamar, you have no right! I am not going to let you do it, and I really mean it,’ I spoke harshly, gripping his shoulder and looking him straight in the eyes. I feit I was doing my duty and it made me forget that I was no match for Ithamar’s strength.

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