Mr. Monday and other tales of Jewish Amsterdam

114 Air. Monday and Other Tales of Jewish Amsterdam

soap-box a couple of feet away. "That shmoe over there did his exams in Theology the other day," he crows. "I know, because I sat next to him in the sweating room when he had to go to the Professor. The student who is before him was put a question, the Professor asked him 'My son, what wouldst Thou do ifThou wert in the wilderness to preach the Gospel to the heathens and a fly comes and settles on your nose?' Says the student 'I would shoo it off gingerly, because we must extend love to all living creatures.'Then the Professor says 'You're an idiot because that fly may give you sleeping sickness. No, you have to take that sonofabitch between your thumb and forefinger, squash him and send him to his eternal salvation.'"

Well, then it was the turn of that fellow over there. Asks the Professor 'My son, what wouldst Thou do ifThou wert in the wilderness to preach the Gospel to the heathens and Thou cometh face to face with a lion?"

Says that shmoe 'I would take him between thumb and forefinger, squash him and send him to his eternal salvation.'

So he failed for his exam because he was too dumb to preach to the savages in Africa, but for the Amstelveld on Monday morning he's good enough."

Sourbeer lives mainly on the sale of"De Socialist", the newspaper of anarchism in Holland. However, he only has very old issues in stock which he has got hold of for practically nothing and sells for fancy prices.

Another star debater is a hefty dock-worker who for years has been constantly trying to demean himself in the eyes of his fellow men. The reason for his self debasement is a much-fingered pamphlet by Max Stirner entitled "The